I was talking to my daughter before Christmas and it turns out that she and I wanted the same thing. We both wanted a microscope. The reason I wanted mine was I wanted to check on putting dandruff under a microscope to see why does it in bed so fast. It is almost as if the roots never dies. This is something that runs in my family. My mother always had this problem. I saw somewhere on the internet where this could be a sign of cancer. It's hard to believe, but my mother had cancer for almost 20 years. How do I know this? Because we live in a small city where there was no hospitals. My sister took my mom to the city for diagnosis 20 years before she died.and she was diagnosed of having cancer. She died 20 years later. This is why I keep my mind open to things that's not conventional. My mom Always at dandruff. There Was no head and shoulder available in those days. rIf I could do it all over again  There are so many things that I'm interested in.  I think I would have love to have been a scientist. If some of the people that have known me all my life would hear me say this, they would called the police. How can I say this ? I have never had any love for math. 

 

I would love to put a danduff flake under a microscope to see if it has life. The reason I want to do this is my curiosity of how fast it reappear in my skull. I never asked my daughter what she wanted a microscope for but that was my reason. I suppose this might be why I have accepted death because I have dealt with that possibility All 2 family members who was ill for so many years. I have heard that many people read the Bible during these times. That would not have work for me. There is a book that I use that is called  Beyond and back. It has many stories in it concerning people around the world experiencing something that they call reincarnation. What ever it was the experiences all seem to be the same. After thinking about what I have gone through in the experienced with death from my family, I think it changed me. 

According to the author of Beyond and Back, There are supposed to be five stages. The last one is acceptance. I think I've been there a long time ago. However, this does not mean that I'm ready to drop dead. I am only saying that I now have fully access all five stages of death preparations through f other people.The last funeral I went to was over 50 years ago. I lived in such a small town that I think that I was traumatized by the many funerals I went to as a child. I think the people there looked at death as some kind of entertainment, Even at this late date in my life I think I'm traumatized a little when I see those things that they put the coffin on fold up. I think I better stick to my real love. I love politics and I love to write. I I'm having such a hard time trying to stay away from commenting on things that I see And read about lately When I think about Iit's not gonna work.  There are so many things that candidates do that I want to write about, but I try not to target individuals. There was once a time in the world of people who always talked about experience candidates. I certainly hope they will change their minds. I bet most of you don't believe me , but if someone would give me the job as the world leader, I would turn it down for my Continuation of freedom and happiness. By no means, am I happy With what's going on in the)

World. I am really afraid for America. I am frightened because It looks as if our leaders don't know what's going on. I am afraid that for too many years the white privilege promise the middle class more than they are going to be able to deliver. I am afraid, because America refuses to face reality in many areas. I listen to a lot of lectures From the top Economists In the world. these are the few people that I agree with. I have noticed for many years How this country does not want anyone to tell them this truth unless the person happened to have white skin. I certainly do not qualify. People like John Mearshemier, talk show host Richard wolff, Glenn Beck, and many others thinks that this economy Is in big trouble. These people are allowed to become billionaires for saying the same thing that I could die for. Remember how angry The American people  became when Dr. King started complaining against the Vietnam war? This is a typical example of the arrogant Americans and the white privilege entitlements. I'm thinking that they believe that Groups of people should be treated like chattel and children.

CHAPTER 3:

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SUGAR IN HONEY:

Why would the American people put sugar in honey? Didn't I once read that sugar is poison?

It is so hard now days to know what's truth or fiction. Consequently, the older I get the less I trust anything. Perhaps if it's because after a life of experience, I combine everything together. There has been so many different twists and turns in my life lately until I can hardly believe it myself. By accident I now understand things that I never thought of before. 

Growing up as a child, I believed myself to be very loved and I certainly was protected. I often think of the fact that I never heard anyone in my entire life speak anything about love. In spite of this reality, I never had any doubt with me knowing that I was very much love by the people I grew up with. This was my reality and I don't think I wanted it any other way. This was freedom for me. I have learned that if you are poor enough you understand that there are things more important than words. As a black person it was very hard for the bread earners to find work. My family always lived on the farm. I was very mis-educated. In spite of this fact I finish high School and have graduated, worked, and retired in the field of psychology. I am thankful that I'm not as vulnerable as I once was in trusting strangers. I was strictly a country person. When I think back I believe I would have been dead had I moved to a city. I was so trusting and I had a bad habit of jumping in cars with strangers. Let me change that, these people are not strangers because of the town size. This still does not remove the fact that old habits are hard to break. When I think about it, the friend that I met when I arrived in San Francisco was born and raised there and we both would go out with only a dime on each of us. I suppose this is what my young friends are telling me when they say things have changed. Yet, I'm not so sure of that in one respect. The only difference I see in those times and today is that the political scene want us to have a different message. They wanted us to think that there's danger where there is none.  I see it as a political move and I will not bother going into it at this time, but at this point of my life I have connected a lot. It is too much to try and convey here. 

There was no reason for me to have known any better because of the environment that I lived in all my life. As I often hear many young people tell me that things are different. I agree with that. However, I would find  is so hard now days to know what's truth or fiction. Consequently, the older I get the less I trust anything. Perhaps if it's because after a life of experience, I combine everything together. There has been so many different twists and turns in my life lately until I can hardly believe it myself. By accident I now understand things that I never thought of before. Growing up as a child, I was very mis-educated. In spite of this fact I finish high School, graduating, 

worked, and retired in the field of psychology. I am thankful that I'm not as vulnerable as I once was. I certainly do not find myself as trusting strangers. I know that this is because of old age and insecurity. Strangely enough it has worked out 100% from me to believe this. When I was young I would walk down the street with my purse open and no one never took a penny from me. Thank goodness up to this point, no one still has never robbed me in the streets. I was strictly a country person. When I think back I believe I would have been dead had I moved to a city. I was so trusting. I would not change my roots for anything in the world. Let me change something I wrote earlier. Margret was born in Los Angeles.

Thank you guys! 

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