..."Im doing premeditated
and what I found is that I'm trying to be a good person ...I want to be apart of universal kindness...While at the same time identifying deception. Universally... Now I realize I'm nothing more than a fly in a spider's web...so I ask you Facebook...Who does God favor...the spider or the fly?...LOL at my theatrics...The answer has vibration and frequency."
I often find myself bewildered because of strange things going on in today's world. Perhaps it's my age. Perhaps it's because of the level of indoctrination that I lived as a young person. I don't think people have gotten more evil. Although, we are supposed to believe this. The only difference I see is that now communication is more available for us all. We now can hear the truth from both sides. I think one big problem today is that people cannot stand reality. An example of this is how the news media ignore things that are happening on the continent of Africa, as if there is no Africa. For the first time I now understand the importance of white privilege to many people around the world. We have been involved in a level of ignorance that's unbelievable. There is little concern and empathy for other human beings.
Why did the American people allow sugar in honey? Did I once read that sugar is poison? Is this the cost of capitalism? Are we this evil? It is hard now days to know what's truth or fiction. Consequently, the older I get the less I trust anything. Perhaps if it's because after a life with racism in America, I now combine everything together. There has been so many different twists and turns with my exprences lately until I can hardly believe it myself. By accident I now understand things that I never thought of before. In spite of everything, growing up as a child, I believed myself to be very loved and I certainly well protected. I often think of the fact that I never heard anyone in my entire life speak anything about love. When I now reflect on this, I believe it was a carry-over from slavery. I am thinking that there are many African Americans who grew up in homes where love was not mentioned. Perhaps because of this reality, I never had any doubt with me knowing that I was very much love by the people I grew up with. This was my reality and I don't think I wanted it no other way. This was freedom for me. I have learned that if you are poor enough you understand that there are things more important than words. As a black person it was very hard for the bread earners to find work. My family always lived on the farm. I was very mis-educated. I now know that it was all by the white supremacist design. In spite of this fact I finish high School and have graduated from college, worked, and
retired in the field of psychology. I am thankful that I'm not as vulnerable as I once was in trusting strangers. I was strictly a country person. When I think back I believe I would have been dead had I moved to a city. I was so naive and I had a bad habit of jumping in cars with strangers. Let me change that, these people were not strangers because of the town size. This still does not remove the fact that old habits are hard to break. When I think about it, the friend that I met when I arrived in San Francisco was born and raised there. My friend Margaret and I would both go out with only a dime on each of us. I suppose this is what my young friends are telling me when they say things have changed. Yet, I'm not so sure of in what respect. One good thing I love when I compare then and now.
The only other difference I see in those times and today is that the political scene want us to have a different message. They want us to think that there's danger where there is none. The goal is to keep us all ignorant in order to control our minds. I grew up during the time the internet was not available. Fortunately now, the white privilege people have lost control over the microphone. I am thinking that this is going to cause a lot of changes with the white privilege entitlements. Unlike what we have always been taught, the white privilege are not the majority. I see it as a political move and I will not bother going into it at this time, but at this point of my life I have connected a lot. It is too much to try and convey here. Like many people, I believe what I was taught. There was no reason for me to have known any better because of the environment that I lived in all my life. When I hear young people tell me that things are different, I agree. However, I would find is so hard now days to know what's truth or fiction. Consequently, the older I get the less I trust anything. I also think that this comes with age. Is it because of a combining everything together? There has been so many different twists and turns in my life lately until I can hardly believe it myself. By accident I now understand things that I never thought of before. I was thinking about something that was funny to me the other day. I remember as a child how we would always refer to punishment as a "whipping" the white privilege people would often talk about a spanking, or time out. Could the two different references be because of the enslavement of black people in this country? I am influenced by a lot of things by design. I was very mis-educated. In spite of this fact I finish high School and graduated from college. I worked, and retired in the field of psychology. I am thankful that I'm not as vulnerable as I once was. I certainly do not find myself as trusting with strangers. I know that this is because of old age and insecurity. Strangely enough it has worked out 100% from me to believe this. When I was young I would walk down the street with my purse open and no one ever took a penny from me. Thank goodness up to this point, no one still has ever robbed me in the streets. I was strictly a country person. When I think back I believe I would have been dead had I moved to a city. I was so trusting. I would not change my roots for anything in the world Let me change something that I wrote earlier. Margret was born in Los Angeles. I miss her so much. She is the only woman that I knew who I could talk politics with.
Thank you guys!
@milojo333.blogspot.com
mildred
CHAPTER TWO:
SUGAR IN HONEY:
